I remember the first time it really mattered to me that someone told me, “No.”
It was my senior year in high school. I’d been accepted to Hampton University, and my parents decided that I could not attend the school of my first choice.[Backstory] I was a hot mess when I was younger.
I didn’t listen, I was brilliantly defiant, and I had a serious mouth on me. I sort of still have choice words for people who are mean to me, but you have to really back me into a corner to get a piece of it.
Mostly, I smile and keep my thoughts to myself, now, because…well…I’m an adult.
Anyway, all the reasons why I used to be like I was fade at this point in life and, though my ego would love to plead my case and explain the extenuating circumstances, the end results are all the matter in the end.
Bottom line, my former rebellion cost me a lot.
As a youngster, attending my first college of choice was a biggie….
…and the fact that my parents were the ones saying no to me was something that haunted me for about 20 years.
So much wasted time…
Saturday morning, April 1st, we left North Carolina for Jamaica, Queens, NY…and it was a brutal trip from top to bottom.
First of all, my Sweet Pea was slower than her usual morning slowness, and then she forgot her identification (after we’d already gotten on the road), and we had to turn around and go back to the house to get it. Once we finally left home for good, it was 11am.
I’d planned to get on the road at 8am.
The morning was a sign of things to come.
The entire drive up Interstate 95 was full of stops and starts. I drove 30-45 miles per hour a lot of the way and have no idea why there were so many slow-downs from North Carolina all the way up to Wilmington, Delaware.
By the time we reached our hotel, it was almost 11pm, and I was shattered with exhaustion.
Deanna ordered something to eat from some late-night-food app I’ve never heard of, and I crashed. Hard.
I assume Deanna eventually did the same because the picture above was the lump of a person I woke up to on Sunday morning.
Tears came to my eyes when I looked at her.
No matter how old she gets, and no matter what kind of frustration I feel about the daily events we experience together, she will always be my sweet, little baby.
My entire life changed on August 8, 1997 at 10:57am.
It was at this exact time that I gave birth to my sweet daughter and named her Deanna Alyse Bradford. Her father was standing right there for it all. He’d created a CD full of amazing music for the event, and had driven me to the hospital with some of the music playing.
While I was in labor, there was Gospel music about pain and suffering and God’s ability to pull us through it all.
And when she was born, he switched the song on the CD to Stevie Wonder’s “Isn’t She Lovely.” We weren’t married, and we were never going to get married for as many colors as there are in the color spectrum, but it was as perfect a moment as it could possibly have been.
The memory is burned in my memory. I always look back on it with fondness.
He even held her up in the air like Shaka Zulu had done in the Roots movie. I don’t know who he dedicated her to, but I distinctly recall him whispering something from his fraternity over her. I also remember frowning and saying, “The blood of Jesus! You don’t say that over a newborn, little baby, Donald!”
Even now, he makes me laugh. And he make me upset. He was silly, funny, inappropriate, kind-hearted, well-meaning, and irresponsible, all at the same time. I often found myself as irritated with him as I wanted to hug him…
…which makes it so strange to have been crying randomly and frequently since January 27th, 2016 when I heard the news that he’d died and gone to be with Jesus.
Yesterday afternoon, I had a great (brief) conversation with my friend Jodi about puppies running around in a parking lot, mean people, and online marketing and lead generation. We always talk about lots of unrelated things when we get on the phone.
It’s one of the reasons why we relate so well.
We are 100% “woman” and not worried about the fact that we can talk about thirteen things in five minutes.
Anyway, while she watched a bunch of puppies run around outside of a store and gushed about how adorable they were, I shared a story about a woman in the Cult of Copy, today, who blasted another woman for a simple spelling error.
Still…I came to the defense of the woman who’d spelled whatever she’d spelled incorrectly by writing as you can see in the image above.
The mean lady responded in a way that’s typical of mean people – by not even acknowledging that she’d been harsh and sarcastic to an absolute stranger. You can’t see the entire conversation, but I’m not the only one who stepped in on her behalf.
It looks like it was a simple question, but she was actually mimicking the first line of the original poster’s question that read: “Have you done your research?”
I tell you…I don’t get people, nowadays. Seems like being a jerk is the flavor of the year.
Last time I checked, you still attract more bees with honey than you ever will with salt (or however the saying goes.)
Few people seem to care about treating people the way they’d want to be treated. I’m sure my comment made little to no difference.
Anyway, I blocked her so that her attitude won’t have me enjoy my social media experience any less. Yay!
(Warning: This article contains ZERO SEO. Enjoy!)
Friday was the day of the launch…and the strangest thing happened to me, that morning.
I got scared.
I started thinking about everything I have learned over the past, five years, and I began to wonder if I wasn’t going to shortchange you by making this my primary offer.
I COMPLETELY chickened out.
The process of this launch has been a LONG two weeks with lots of writing, very little sleeping, a tiny bit of sickness, some worrying, and a whole lot of planning.
See…I am determined that this is the year that I finally hit six figures. DETERMINED!
I’ve taken what I have learned about copywriting from my copywriting course at AWAI (American Writers and Artists, Inc) and what I’ve learned about marketing and emailing from the great Ben Settle, and I’ve created a very comfortable 5-figure income.
Sometimes, I still shake my head. Everything is happening so quickly. I am grateful for God’s blessing me and showing me how to work.
Is it just me, or is traffic confusing to you?
Well…it’s been confusing to me the ENTIRE time I’ve been online – until recently.
Recently, I was introduced to a group of people who know traffic and who, for a certain price point, will share their precious knowledge.
For that I’m grateful.
What I want to let YOU know is that traffic isn’t really all that difficult.
I got a question from a subscriber…and my answer to her should be helpful to you.
She writes: “Hi Christi, I have been reading your emails about marketing through email and I have not attempted it because #1, people are always telling me they don’t read their emails and, #2, I have no idea how to do it.
“If it is that profitable, I would like to learn how.
“My email list consists mostly of friends and family that I have already approached about
her home business, and I find with the people I know best, they just don’t hear me or want to hear me. Have no solution for that.”
My response: Many people don’t read email because they are busy. They are also not opening emails because the average person who sends out emails is doing so in a very self-centered way…
There’s this thing my grandmothers used to say about chickens coming home to roost. There’s also a thing they used to say about there mostly likely being fire if there’s smoke.
When I was a little girl, I didn’t know what they meant. Even when I got older and went away to college, I still didn’t get it.
It wasn’t until I was grown and had a child of my own that everything clicked and I understood the laws of reaping and sowing.
As I matured, when I did something hurtful to someone else, I tried to apologize and fix it to the best of my ability, and when I’d done nothing wrong, I worked diligently to ignore drama and forgive people who didn’t know what they didn’t know.
The older I get, the more I appreciate both of my grandmothers.
Here’s how I know most marketers are lying about building influence online. You’ve gotta read this entire email to see what I mean, though… 😉
When I first set out to learn internet marketing, I felt pretty sure that was going to be a super duper quick success story.
Deep down inside, I just believed it. I thought I could create influence by being myself…because that’s what the guru told me I could do.
And guess what? He was dead wrong…which meant that I was dead wrong, too.
I made sales (some of them big, most of them small) every now and then, but I never made any money, consistently.
And after a couple of years of struggle and after getting taken advantage of by some folk who I really trusted, I decided to just give up on everything related to IM for about two years.
When I did come back to it, I was very tentative…until I found copywriting.